I find that the most miserable state of affairs is the one in which you have not made up your mind to something. God gave us a thinking brain that we should use to arrive at conclusions, not to constantly dither and balk at moral dilemmas.
At the beginning of a new marriage, there is a tendency to watch one’s spouse to see if he or she will fulfill certain expectations that one unwittingly smuggled into the marriage: Will he listen to all my whining? Will he always be sensitive to my moods? Will he remember the things that are important to me? Will our mutual giving be totally equal? (In other words, will he be God?)
Then one day the Spirit brings to mind a verse:
“… present your bodies as a living sacrifice …” (Romans 12:1).
And on this particular day you decide not to blow it off but to take the thought seriously. And more than taking the thought seriously, you decide to make a decision as to whether you will act upon it. You say to yourself:
“God tells me to present my body as a living sacrifice. A sacrifice, in the Old Testament, is an animal that is put to death for the sake of someone else. A sacrificial animal does not talk back. A sacrifice does not argue. A sacrifice, in the New Testament, is Jesus Christ, who not only died on an altar like an animal but who spent His entire life dying to personal desires so as to be completely at the beck and call of His Father.”
Once you have seen this truth, you must either obey it immediately or reject immediately. There is no turning back into ignorance. Speaking for myself, I find the only course that brings inner peace is the one in which you make up your mind to be a living sacrifice in obedience to God’s command. Halfway measures are futile. Attempts to cut a deal are futile. Try giving God 90 percent and to reserving for yourself 10 percent, and you end up with the 10 percent swallowing up the 90. But to give all to God and to one’s mate is the very essence and taste of freedom.